Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Oct/ Chapter 2: The Credit Crunch and dating

I'm a banker, and these are scary times for bankers. We're at the front lines of the current credit crunch, and we can see and understand the implications of what's happening on the wider economy. Lots of bankers expect to have no bonus this year and some of us will lose our jobs.

But are the times really that bad or have we gotten too comfortable with our easy lifestyles? Our grandparents had to live through a global war, and their parents had to live through the great depression. Both events that were much worse than what we're facing now.

In 1933, by the end of the great depression, the unemployment rate had risen to 25% in the US. That's unlikely to happen now, but it won't be surprising if the unemployment rate hits 10% in the US from this mess, and the banking industry could well cut 25% of the global banking work force.

Back then, people stuck together at the worst of times. But in the modern era, most people find it hard to even stick with one person at the best of times. We've gotten real picky, and people can afford to go out and date lots of partners before ever considering settling down for one.

Will dating patterns change now that the shit has hit the fan? Maybe.......

Certainly when I pick a girl now, I want someone that's going to stick with me through the good times and the bad. Isn't that meant to be in the marriage vows? I don't want to date anyone that wants me to buy them Prada hand bags, or Jimmy Choos. What if I lost my job next week? The girl's not even happy if I don't take her out to the best resturants, is she going to really queue up with me when I need to go to the soap kitchen for free food?

Most probably not.

Food for thought........when finding a partner, make sure they will stick around during the recession.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Beautiful gals always have too many choices and so are rich men.

Carlton Bradshaw said...

No worries, I'm going to some jungle deep in Africa to find myself a woman with a big fucked up afro and a plate lip who has no idea what money is.

Anonymous said...

Funny, just popped into this blog for first time while time watching sex and the city - Hk, sex and the guys inbetween that, permanent issue for me as a 'nice girl' - I don't even feel compassion for guys like you out there...Get back to real life, this city is not real in here, this is a big soap bubble, an ivory tower, a playground, Neander Valley,HK, brings out the best and the worst in people , funny to watch from a distance, but I will definetely keep away from 'bankers' in here, with or without recession...

Carlton Bradshaw said...

Haha, you're going to love my book then. I'm going to be giving details about all the types of men that a girl should avoid.

Anonymous said...

i agree with you on that this last post. that's why the second i sniff out a girl that seems too materialistic or seems to be after the greenbacks i run run run... The excuse i always hear from girls are "well i want a man that can provide for the family and kids if we ever get to that point so of course money is important!" But when the importance of money supercedes a true genuine loving relationship then no thanks. I don't care how hot you are or how "nice" you treat me.

Carlton Bradshaw said...

What I find amazing is some women think kids eat Gucci for dinner.......

Anonymous said...

Me again, the SATC fan. Well, frankly speaking I don´t need a book to know what men to avoid - HK tought me that lesson very fast.Just watch the big Greek classical comedy called Lang Kwai Fong on a Saturday eve, it´s all in there.No books needed...I think life itself is much more interesting than just reading about it.

Carlton Bradshaw said...

If real life was so much more interesting, why would you watch SATC then? Or even visit this blog?

There's stuff on film and print that's more interesting than real life, that's why it exists.

As for this statement: "I don't even feel compassion for guys like you out there...Get back to real life". Was this aimed at me?

Let me ask you something. Why do you think I even posted up the "we're screwed" post? Do you think I was really depressed and looking for sympathy, or was I reporting the story in a way that was less judgemental on the other guys in the story?

The good thing about writing is that you can examine issues from various perspectives that doesn't exist in real life.

Also, don't get too bitter about the whole scene. Clarity comes from being unbiased and objective in observations.

Anonymous said...

Tho there's some truth to what u r saying.... to be fair, it's like giving advise to gals... "Dun choose man who likes or goes for looks!"....

Hilarious.....

It's always striking a balance honey...

Anonymous said...

Carlton, don't need to get all upset with this SATC fan girl... she is really just a pathetic bitter loser who can't face real life, let alone work on it for better.

Whats wrong with bankers? there are bad ones and there are good ones, just like in all industries. Yes generally they have more money so they could be cockier. But honestly if its not becoz girls in hk suck up for money, the rich guys wont be as spoiled. Still i meet so many ppl outside finance and many of them are just desperate to get in!! I am a banker myself and i'm a girl. I have loads of friends from everywhere and they all lovely! My love life isn't the best coz i sometimes meet wrong guys too but i am not gonna just say hk doesnt have good guys at all. Fact is, bitter girl, good guys see you and they will be turned off by your bitterness and cynicism.

And, we don't need your compassion. Not at all. We're going to be fine. Don't dream abt having a good time if one day banking industry fails. If we once lose our jobs and come out to other industries we'll be competing with you and you'd better be prepared.

Lastly.. if you really feel so strongly against hk, why are you still here? isn't it amusing? i mean you, yourself! dont make yourself a fool here... Carlton is a boy and he is honest enough to present truth..so at least show some gratitude!

- LM

Carlton Bradshaw said...

"Tho there's some truth to what u r saying.... to be fair, it's like giving advise to gals... "Dun choose man who likes or goes for looks!"....

Hilarious.....

It's always striking a balance honey..."

Umm, I wasn't literal in this post. I didn't fully expect to be queuing up for free food.

Besides, this post is as much addressed to the girls as it is addressed to the guys.

Lots of women don't understand they're lowering their chances at finding a decent guy by being too materialistic. They're screwing themselves, just like the player is screwing himself.

If the post was just telling guys not to pick girls that won't stay for the recession, it's a bit too obvious, don't you think?

Also, I wanted to address the fact the times have really changed. People these days won't be able to handle misery the way our grandparents did.

Anonymous said...

Hi Carlton, where can I get your book? Do you sell it on internet as well?

Anonymous said...

Hi Carlton, where can I get your book? Do you sell it on internet as well?

Carlton Bradshaw said...

Hmm, after speaking to a guy who's in publishing I think I might need to self publish, and then if it sells I will sell the rights to a big publisher that can do a better job promoting and selling the book.

It's hard getting any piece of work to a large publisher if I don't have an agent and nothing published yet.

If anyone knows realiable contacts in the publishing industry in the UK or US please let me know.

Lisa said...

Interesting post - my sister passed this site to me out of interest and since we're both expats living in HK, it's nice to read other expat views in HK.

I was married before I moved to HK so I never really got to play the singles market here (not sure if I would have wanted to though based on your experiences and friends of mine).

The one thing I will say is that you have to recognize the culture of HK for what it is. For starters, those who are born here are bombarded with materialistic media since birth. This doesn't apply to the masses, but specifically to those who are at least middle-class. Even high school kids are flinging LVs left right and center. Truth to be told, being born and raised in Toronto, I got my first Prada at the ripe age of 23!! I'm digressing, but on to people who haven't grown up here, they ultimately become preys of materialistic media. If you work in Central, especially in a bank, you'll notice that many people are dressed to impress with shiny rolexes or the newest gucci bag. It's a tough environment to live in and vanity isn't without consequence.

Ultimately, the advice I can give is that you'll probably have to dig through the vanity first before you can see the person. The depth of vanity will vary in person to person, but it's an extra step in the dating process that most HKers will have to do. Both my sisters and I are very down to earth, but I don't deny I'm vain. I appreciate nice clothes and will wear nice watches but since having children and different priorities, I no longer wear watches and I haven't purchased a brand name bag since 2004 (my gawd! the thought of using an old bag). All my money now goes to my children, their schooling, their clothes, their toys, their happiness - and then once in awhile I'll buy a nice sweater or something from UNIQLO. Anyways, don't be too quick to judge the surface - I'm sure there are plenty of genuinely nice girls who are looking for a solid guy out there. And if you don't find any, maybe I can introduce you to a few. Thanks for this blog - I'll continue to read it because you're a pretty funny guy.

Anonymous said...

I'm currently in Sydney and will move to Dallas next Jan.Is there any possbilities I can get this book in Dallas? or maybe you can mail it to me if you provide your account details?Thanks

Carlton Bradshaw said...

Lisa, great points and thanks for the support.

Anon, I'll try and get the book sold online via some means, say on Amazon.

Meanwhile please let your friends know about this blog since I will try and use this blog to promote the book as well. Thanks!

Isaac said...

I was hoping to speak directly with the editor of this blog. What is his email address?

Carlton Bradshaw said...

Williebooker88@hotmail.com

Anonymous said...

Yo carlton, Nice work on the blog. You are stirring up some pretty deep emotions here.

It is a good indication that you are hitting the right spot.

Really like your recent posts, more snappy and it is great that you are linking back to everyday news and events.

Anyway keep up the good work and will catch up with you at the end of the month for the big day.

anyway was reading a post on the web... Thought I will share it with you all....

" Live by the 3 R's
R espect for self
R espect for others
R esponsibility for all your actions
When you lose, don’t lose the lesson
Remember that not getting what you want in life can be a wonderful stroke of luck
Judge your success by what you had to give in order to get it
Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon ." Dalai Lama

Words of wisdom from the Dalai Lama, mate... players break heart, you are bound to meet the bad apples once in your life... just make sure you remember the lessons and don't get bitter... Love Life and that person that seems so hard to find will find you....

Take it easy.

Website counter