Apr/ Chapter 3: Quote of the day

"If you ever want something badly, let it go. If it comes back to you, then it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never yours to begin with." Demi Moore, Indecent proposal

Although I hate to quote movies, this is a great quote, because it clearly explains one of the most important things about relationships for both men and women.

One of the secrets of being more attractive is if you don't actually worry about losing the other person. When a partner starts to withdrawl or not treat you well, it's more effective to be indifferent than to chase them and act insecure or needy. Of course if you really like them that's going to be hard to do, but that's where the secret lies.

The other side of following through with this is of course, if the other person doesn't really care about you then they won't chase anyway. That's not to say to everyone should dump their partners immediately to test this theory out. The point is, if the partner is lukewarm or not treating you well, you've got nothing to lose by dumping them.

Of course it's going to hurt, that's why it's important to focus on the point that you've got nothing to lose.

Apr/ Chapter 2: Cultural influence

A couple of girls asked me if I felt HK girls are easy based on my last post about pick up artists. Obviously there's displeasure at any hint of that, and I understand so let me clear things up.

It depends on the definition of easy. A better way to explain it here in Asia is there's a skew. It's much easier for an elligible guy in Asia to meet and pick up many women, much easier than the West. The average guy however finds it much harder.

The skew is even greater in China or Taiwan. The problem is with the Chinese culture (and yes I'm Chinese, I'm not being racist) which gives people more pressure to find $ and get married than Western cultures that are more laid back about money and marriage.

Therefore eligible guys find it much easier to get a girl whether for the short term or a proper relationship because they can play on the desires of the girl. In the US a not very outgoing guy who actually has a decent job will find it much harder to find a decent girl compared to here.

On the other side of the scale many average Chinese guys can't afford to date HK girls, and/or they might be lacking in personality. So there's a horde of local guys that have gone to China to find wives. With the mass exodus, it skews the single and available sex ratio and makes the competition for elligible guys even tougher for the girls, and easier for the eligible guys.

Of course not even woman in Asia puts huge emphasize on a guys wealth but it doesn't matter if you don't, because other girls are competing with you. Women in Asia really should lower their standards on what the guy makes, and raise the standards on how men treat them and what those men can get away with.

If overnight all women dumped men that cheated, or treated their GFs poorly. You know what would happen? Men would fear not being able to find a gf or wife and behave better. As long as a large % of women are willing to put up with men behaving badly, then that ruins it for all women.

Apr/ Chapter 1: Speed seduction

First, take a look at this program:

http://mytv.tvb.com/news/pearlreport/20558

The global pick up artist community has been steadily growing for a number of years now. For those that are not familiar with what pick up artists are or PUA, they are guys who go out of their way to deliberately learn what make women tick and how to chat them up.

The Chinese guys in the Pearl Report were really poor in my opinion, lacking confidence and couldn't talk smoothly. But some of the top PUA in the US or around the world have extremely high success rates.

If you read the methods they're created, it's quite amazing. They've basically broken down the process of seduction into learnable steps, from opening lines, to how to act in front of women, to how to build comfort with women, until they have sex with the man.

As with all useful tools and weapons, there are of course going to be people that benefit, and those that will abuse the system. The PUA methods will help men that were unable to attract women, whilst creating new legions of players that will use the methods to get loads of women to have sex with them.

In Asia, a guy with money and relatively confident already has a huge advantage in meeting women. I'm not sure the PUA business will have as much demand here as in the West were the pick up process is relatively harder. Curious what the girls think about this new invasion in Asia.